Chúc mừng năm mới! Happy New Year!

Happy New Year at home

Chúc mừng năm mới!  Gung hay fat choy!  Gong xi fa cai!  That would be “Happy (Lunar) New Year” in Vietnamese, Cantonese, and Mandarin!

It is the Year of the Ox, and I just want to wish everyone and your families good luck, good health, and prosperity.

We’re off to visit a few temples in the area tomorrow as part of our New Year’s so if y’all are interested I will be posting, taking a few snaps.

Love, hugs, kisses, good luck, all the happiness in the world, and a little rock n’ roll on top of that.

inauguration photo Flickr fun

Free button from C-Span

For the curious, I uploaded a few pics from our Inauguration Day adventure up onto Flickr.  Couldn’t take as many as I wanted.  The cold bit me wee fingers quite nastily and made my little phone wig out a wee bit as well.  Still, would do it all over again if I could and try to get a few more out of my frozen digits and device.

How I learned to stop worrying and love a piece of plastic

I have to make a confession: I have totally become enamored of a $30 piece of black plastic with the texture of a newspaper recycling bin and the complexity of a Pre-K Lego set.  No electricity required. One moving part.  30 bucks.  And I am totally enamored.  If I had that much literary capability, I’d write a sonnet.  No bullshit.  Thank the Powers That Be that I don’t have it.  Literary power, not bullshit.  Have that in droves (just kidding, I hope).

The Podium CoolPad.

The object of my affection is the Road Tools™ PodiumPad which I acquired for (Agador) Spartacus Jones via Apple’s Store.  As longtime laptop-on-lap enthusiasts know, laps don’t provide the greatest air flow.  Also, ultra-thin, ultra-flat form factor doesn’t always provide the most ergonomic experience.  So I figured that since the PodiumPad was highly rated and looked bright and shiny, why not go for it?

I was a little nervous opening the package for two reasons: first, the label on the package is a couple of years old, back from that venerable era of PowerBooks and iBooks.  Yikes.  What can that say about the product if the company has not updated the packaging in a long time?

Second, the stand, which looked shiny and fancy on the site, was composed of not-particularly-aesthetically-pleasing, rough, black plastic.  It didn’t look…cool.  Double Yikes.

BUT…  Ho ho!  Underneath its gruff exterior hides a great deal of simple, well-thought engineering.  You can adjust the height of the PodiumPad through a series of interlocking pieces, four of which have rubberized pads on which your computer actually rests.  There’s also an extender-type bar if your laptop comes in 17″ or too-big-to-really-be-a-laptop sizes.  If you prefer a “negative tilt,” just put your laptop on in the other direction.

Prop it.

Extend it.

Stack 'em.

The base is trapezoidal and made of two, relatively thin plates attached through the center with a plastic pivot.  They move like butter (the smooth, hand-churned-by-attractive-farm-maid kind).  Most importantly, it worked.  Oh, yes.  Though it’s not composed of aluminum or some other fancy, conductive metal and doesn’t have a fan, it keeps my laptop nice and cool, silently and efficiently.

Okay, so not NASA-level brilliance or CES-worthy cool, but awesome enough that it deserves its many muy positive reviews.

muyPositiveReviews++;

All this despite less-than-slick styling and obsolete packaging.  Just goes to show you that good, simple engineering and competent manufacturing goes a bloody long way.

Amalgamation Station, what’s their inspiration?

SciFi’s original movies rank at the top of horrid-stuff-you-love charts.  But you ever get repeated, disparate feelings of déjà vu?

I am now thoroughly convinced that you can break any SciFi film down into recognizable constituents numbering no less than two, averaging three.  They’re all just these strange, decently filmed, horribly special-effect-ed stews thrown haphazardly together by a bunch of drunk-off-their-keesters cooks groping in the dark for whatever is closest in the fridge.

Beowulf (1999) starring Christopher Lambert and Rhona Mitra

Yesterday, while waiting for playoff-ness to begin, we happened upon this Beowulf interpretation starring Christopher Lambert.  Instead of the usual Old English, medieval-kinda, viking-kinda fare, we got an action flick set in a post-apocalyptic Sweden.  There were mechanized, flamethrowing pincers on the towers, which were patrolled by bmx-padding-clad soldiers wielding weapons affixed with buzzsaws (but no guns).  Instead of a funeral pyre longboat, the king was cremated in an incinerator (I think, I could be wrong).  Also Beowulf has super powers of some sort derived from a half-demon heritage and fights the evil inside by fighting the evil outside.

Hmm, so we have:

Beowulf + Mad Max + sprinkling of Blade = crazy-ass film

I’m imagining the creative folks at SciFi in the office with a dart board with tons of movie titles taped to it.  When the writers need a new movie idea, they just throw a few darts and then combine whatever happens to hit.

“Alright guys, I’ve got Apocalypto + Jurassic Park.  Hmm.  I’ve got it!  Aztec Rex!”

Apocalypto (2006)

Jurassic Park (1993)

Aztec Rex (2008)

Don’t mistake me.  I love SciFi films.   I found myself guiltily asking to watch.  Did I regret it?  Hell no and of course not.

Did I mention that Grendel’s mum had a head design that I swear must be directly inspired if not lovingly scammed from the Borg Queen?  In human form she’s blond avec 80s/90s wavy hot iron hair, breast implants, and wears so much nothing that SciFi pulled out the blurs.  Of course, she (successfully) attempted to seduce a soldier named Roland, and I can’t help but scream, “Dude, a hot, practically naked blonde with a bad perm appearing out of nowhere and throwing herself at you is EVIL.  Gird your loins, dammit!”

T’was a flick chock full of favorite B-movie sins:

- Ridiculous dialog:  “But tonight I am full of magic.” And behold, a million innuendos and dirty jokes were begotten.

-Unfair gender-based stylings: All of the men wield huge claymores and longswords (the sports car for the medieval or the simply anachronistic), while Rhona Mitra (hotness!) runs around with her boobs perfectly propped (it’s Sweden, must be bloody cold) and a dinner knife.  Yes, a dinner knife.

“Oh, look at the big scary monster with purple fumes and nasty, big pointy teeth!  Feel the vengeance of my silverware!”

-Awkward sex scenes: Grendel’s mum comes to give Hrothgar (ahem) pleasant dreams.  And I swear they re-used footage in those bits.  Literally cut-and-paste.

-Really, really, really fast and easy conflict resolution and denoument:

GRENDEL’S MUM: Rawr!  Beowulf, gaze up at my true, considerably less sexy, badly CGI-ed form!

BEOWULF: [insert zippy quip] I now poke you with a flaming stick!  [Grendel's mom not only goes up like last year's Christmas tree after that unfortunate oven-roast incident but takes the whole bloody castle with her in less than a minute]

Later that day (10 seconds later actually)…

KYRA (Rhona Mitra): Beowulf, I love you.  Take me with you.

BEOWULF: No.  I am too moody and forcibly raspy-voiced.

KYRA: Yes!  I will get you a Ricola!

BEOWULF: No.

KYRA: Yes!  I will have hot, chilly-breasted sex with you lots!

BEOWULF: No.

KYRA : Please?

BEOWULF: Well, okay.

All in all, the whole movie-mixing method produces brilliance, bloody awesome art even.  XoXoX, SciFi.

Vector Drawing for Dummies: VECTORTUTS

VECTORTUTS: Spoonfed vectors

Stumbled upon this great site for vector tutorials.  Some pretty swanky stuff done step-by-step for your edification.